Hope you can handle the heat, kiddies!

Now repeat after me: "Gumbo is not an exact science!" Gumbo recipes vary from person to person. Some recipes can be very involved and complex, but ours is a "throw it in the pot and cook it already" style recipe.
We always use chicken breast meat for this recipe, and cajun/gumbo seasoning that doesn't require a roux. "Roux" is the *secret* to good gumbo, and it's difficult to make.. so we're going to do this lazy-man style, okay?
Now first you have to develope a nice, thick French accent with a southern twang. If you don't get this right, the gumbo will be a complete flop!

If you're not talkin' coonass, then you aint gonna have good gumbo!
What you'll need:
1. A gumbo pot, one of those big silver things you could give your infant a bath in. You know the kind. None of those sissy pans that hold little cornish hens or macaroni and cheese.
2. Tony Chachere's cajun seasoning (we call this stuff "File"). but Tony Chachere's makes a "Louisianna Seasoning" that's used for quick gumbo recipes.
2B. OTHER seasonings: you have to try what works for your taste buds, but we generally use garlic powder, pepper, etc. Get to weird with the seasonings and the gumbo will be a flop, trust me.
3. Hot pepper sauce (Tony Chachere's makes the best), and I mean the kind that would burn the tongue right out of your mouth if you dropped even a smidge on it!
4. Celery, onion, bell pepper, chopped. Okra (optional: we don't use it in our gumbo). how much of the veggies depends on your taste. We've been known to use a cup of each, and sometimes even more... depending on our mood and taste at the time.
5. Chicken breasts with skin (4 large, or a whole chicken...), cut or shredded into strips... none of that perfectly symmetrical square stuff either, kids! and don't throw that skin away either! This isn't weight watchers, you know!
6. Sausage, not ground, already cooked (this is the easy recipe, remember?). Even lite sausage works, believe it or not, but make sure it's the fully cooked kind. Cut this into disks.
7. Water... enough to cover the chicken when it's cooking. You'll need to add a little here and there as we go, judging how much by how brothy you want your gumbo to be.
Put chicken (with bone and skin) and veggies in the pan with the water.
Boil your chicken (WITH THE BONE and SKIN) until it's falling off the bone. Once it's cooked and tender remove the chicken and remove the bones and skin and gristle. Put the chicken back in that yummy broth!
Now slice that sausage and plop them babies in the pan with the chicken. Add your Tony's seasoning and let the magic begin!
Hot sauce can be added either IN the pot after it's done cooking, OR you can add a few drops to the bowl separately if you're cooking for women, children, or sissies.
How long you simmer the gumbo really depends on the seasoning you use. In this case we're using pre-packaged, so you have to go by the directions on the box. However, don't add any rice to the gumbo... I'll get to that in a minute...
RICE is optional----but it's about as optional as levies in New Orleans. Get the picture? Okay.
Cook your rice separate from the gumbo and pour the gumbo over the cooked rice when you're ready to eat.
HINT: Don't eat it all in one night! Gumbo tends to taste even better the next day.
PS... almost forgot to add this, but the gumbo doesn't have to be hot. Leave off the hot sauce, tobasco, etc. and you should be okay. Just keep the tissues handy all the same, though.